Eeeew! Grosss!

So...SirW and i have been together for over a year now.  Most of O/our time is spent on skype due to the soon-to-be-nonexistent distance.  Every few months, He visits me or i visit Him.  Things are fucking fantastic i tell Y/you!!!

Last night, SirW reassured me that my Blogspot was a place i could post about anything, be it good, bad, rants, complaints about Him, anything...and it got me thinking about a subject i have thought about on occasion, but feel it's silly to bring up, but here goes:

Before i get there (lol), let me just say that since meeting SirW, my self esteem, which i thought was just fine, improved a great deal.  Most of it had to do with my self image: how i see myself.  When W/we first got together, i could not believe a Man so gorgeous from head to toe, inside and out would be interested in me, when He could have any woman He wanted.  This goes beyond outer appearances, but HOLY SHIT is He unbelievably beautiful: His face is so handsome and masculine, with His hard jaw and piercing blue eyes.  His body, whoa...no i mean WHOA!  i never saw a 6-pack abs up close and personal and i am convinced that 'Once you go 6-pack, you never go back!"  The muscles He posseses all over, the tattoos, His dressing style - all of it is so incredible that i felt undeserving in the beginning.  Slowly, He worked on how i see myself and eventually, the fact that i was not perfect, but perfect for Him.  i possessed the qualities that turned Him on:  my body, my face, my dark hair (He had always dated blonds) and my personality.  i am all the things He had seen in several women, all wrapped up in one woman:  me.  i have come along way - i feel insanely sexy all the time.  i feel so pretty, petite (this was hard for me to see) and all feminine!

i enjoy preparing His/my body for Him.  i bathe i the morning and each night.  i use beautifully fragranced bath salts, oils, soaps and bubbles.  i brush my teeth, gums and tongue thoroughly.  i apply make up, fix my hair, apply rouge to my nipples and cunt lips in most cases (now).  All this just to see Him on skype?  Yes, for it is now a habit that i will continue to do when W/we are finally living together.

Now then, on to the part that got this post its title (Eeeew!  Grosss!):

You see, there are certain things that a couple will go through on the way to their eternity (lol).  One of them is farting - OK, i said it, yes farting!  And furthermore, how about going Pooh - OK, i said it, yes Pooh!  i do try to wait until there's a washroom available when W/we are out and about, but there are moments when 'it' just won't wait.  How can i possibly fart or stink up the washroom still feel pretty?  W/we've joked about it a little.  He told me to tell Him, "Don't go into that washroom for 10 minutes, if You know what's good for You."  i thought about making a sign that says, "Nothng happened in here, but i would not enter unless You have a gas mask."  But that would be rather obvious, so how do i overcome this issue and not be totally embarrassed if/when it happens?

i bring this up now because i am on a new diet.  It's called Isagenix and involves cleansing and fat burning.  Anyway, i had not gone # 2 in quite a few days...until this afternoon.  It wasn't a bowl-full, but OH MY GAWD did it stink like something had died back in the 80's!!!

i just always want His image of me to stay the way it is and not be tainted, if Y/you will...

*whew* glad i got that off my chest.  By now, Y/you have realized that i have a vile sense of humor and am not afraid to show it *wink*

Have a harmonious day A/all!

kitten{SirW}