Thursday, April 28, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Dinner by Candlelight
Though Sir and i have much physical distance between U/us, the closeness W/we maintain allows that fact to disappear into the the many facets of O/our relationship. Yes folks, romance can and does exist within the D/s world, if it is desired.
For instance, last week, W/we decided to gather the same ingredients and cook the same meal together - well not together, but at the same time: Him in His kitchen and me in mine, thousands of miles apart for Easter dinner on Sunday (O/our camera's were facing the kitchen and i was, of course, naked).
It was kitten's recipe, so kitten gently instructed (i use that word loosely - lol) Sir the preparations for the meal, which was a specialty of mine: Chicken Quesadilla *licks lips*
He chopped onions while i chopped onions. He roasted the different colored peppers as i roasted peppers. W/we sauteed and stirred while W/we smiled and laughed together. W/we added the chicken and finished the mixture while W/we sipped our respective beers.
Then W/we put the meal together: butter in the pan, then a tortilla, cheese, mixture, cheese, top tortilla, flip and done :)
He told me to get dressed up with high heels, so i did (without hesitation). When i returned, the screen was dark...until the candlelight softly lit the face of my Dom, my Sir, my Love...
W/we ate, drank, talked and laughed - it was sooo romantic!
p.s. Today marks O/our 3 months together (He sent beautiful roses with a handwritten card that told a story of the the treasure that is U/us: rose and Thorn.
--kitten for Sir
Conquer Me!
Sir sent me a book to read called "Conquer Me." Well actually, i read it allowed to Him over skype and W/we are highly enjoying it. kitten will read a chapter or two (sometimes more) a night (most nights) and W/we discuss certain points that jump out at either of U/us. Last night, between chapters, Sir had me "play" and try to read at the same time...i giggled and read and had multiple orgasms and read and giggled and read - kitten LOVES reading!!! Anyway, I wanted to shre the book, as it is an awesome read that i highly recommend *smiles*
"A thoughtful, comforting guide to the ups and downs of life as a femsub, offering insights on the inner journey, and friendly advice on getting the most out of your BDSM relationships." - Gloria Brame, author, Different Loving
Kacie Cunningham had her first real experience with kink when she was 18 years old, and has spent the last decade searching out better and safer ways of doing it. Some of her favorite non-kinky things to do are read, sew, knit, and bake, and she spends much of her time writing, loving, and laughing. At the time of publication, she has been with her Master for four years, and they live in Indianapolis, with their two dogs and two fish. They hope to one day find the perfect submissive girl to add to their family, but they aren't looking. This is her first book.
--kitten for Sir
Conquer Me: girl-to-girl wisdom about fulfilling your submissive desires
Submissive women have needs just like anybody else. But how can a woman get her needs met when she's relinquished her power to her dominant partner? With warmth, wisdom and a down-to-earth approach, an experienced submissive analyzes the realities of the dominant/submissive lifestyle and suggests ways both partners can experience the greatest possible growth and pleasure.
At the heart of the book is a new emotion Cunningham has dubbed "Conquer Me" - defined as "the submissive's internal demand for a show of strength." This book explains this unique need and how to get it met - essential knowledge for any submissive or couple who wants to get the most out of their D/S lifestyle.
What the experts are saying
"It's easy to write about toys and technique. Kacie Cunningham goes beyond that into the maelstrom of wants, needs, rewards and disappointments that makes up the world of the submissive. I recommend this book to submissives for it has what they need to know and to dominants because it has what they should know." - John Warren, author, The Loving Dominant"A thoughtful, comforting guide to the ups and downs of life as a femsub, offering insights on the inner journey, and friendly advice on getting the most out of your BDSM relationships." - Gloria Brame, author, Different Loving
About the author
Kacie Cunningham had her first real experience with kink when she was 18 years old, and has spent the last decade searching out better and safer ways of doing it. Some of her favorite non-kinky things to do are read, sew, knit, and bake, and she spends much of her time writing, loving, and laughing. At the time of publication, she has been with her Master for four years, and they live in Indianapolis, with their two dogs and two fish. They hope to one day find the perfect submissive girl to add to their family, but they aren't looking. This is her first book.toodles!
--kitten for Sir
Monday, April 25, 2011
Love at First Bight!
kitten has had a busy week, so the blogs had to shift to the back burner for a few days, but that certainly does not mean that the training did. In fact, Sir and i did lots of training with Rope! kitten loves Rope, in fact, when Sir did the 1st roping on me, it was Love at first Bight!
During the course of kitten's training by Sir, which is done on a daily basis in most cases, barring unforeseen circumstances. W/we work on nipple play and building my pain tolerance with pegging and clamping. W/we review the various positions and their purpose. He instructs me on different rope bondage styles and techniques, which kitten just absolutely fell in love with!!!. Sir even got me a cute bumper sticker that says, "Rope Marks Are Beautiful." And thus, the research began: Numerous hours and countless websites were searched in order to bring this posting together - hope you enjoy it!
In the bight
The phrase in the bight (or on a bight) means a bight of line is itself being used to make a knot. Specifically this means that the knot can be formed without access to the ends of the rope.[3] This can be an important property for knots used in situations where the ends of the rope are inaccessible, such as forming a fixed loop in the middle of a long climbing rope.
Many knots normally tied with an end also have a form which is tied in the bight, for instance the bowline and the bowline on a bight. In other cases a knot being tied in the bight is a matter of the method of tying rather than a difference in the completed form of the knot. For example the clove hitch can be made in the bight if it is being slipped over the end of a post but not if being cast onto a closed ring, which requires access to an end of the rope. Other knots, such as the overhand knot, cannot be tied in the bight without changing their final form.
 | |
| Rope Marks Are Beautiful! |
- Shrimp tie, also known as ebi tie or prawn tie
- Shibari (縛り, a Japanese bondage style, also called Kinbaku and Nawa shibari)
Shibari! - Shinju (breast harness)
--kitten for Sir
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Lessons Learned
Each night, at the end of kitten's training, Sir will assign the next days tasks that i am to follow. In the morning, He usually has me either peg or clamp my nipples for a specified period of time (typically 10 minutes), in the submissive position in front of the mirror with the exact thoughts He designates for me. He likes to change it up here and there, so it remains fresh and i keep learning and expanding my experience, while enhancing the joy of O/our D/s relationship.
Last night, my next day's tasks were as follows:
10 minutes with pegs (if my nipples were up to it) in the submissive position in front of the mirror without my temporary collar (ball gag turned around) and see myself as He sees me (OH: He chose the coolest lick'em-stick'em tattoos for me the previous evening and put them on before O/our training session ended) and enjoy seeing the tatts, and after 5 minutes, i was to put the temp collar on and compare the two feelings. He told me i did not have to carry the butt plug in my purse, but to still keep His flogger with me.
 |
| kitten for Sir |
kitten was also instructed to do 2 additional things:
1) Clamp the silver chained clothes pegs to the bottom of my bra, so that the chain would move as i walked and cause me to think about my Dom
2) Message Him with my neck, wrist and ankle size, so He can have things (collars, etc.) custom made for His kitten
He also made it known He'd like me to blog, if possible (and continue my reading of other sub and Dom blogs) on a daily basis.
Seems pretty simple, right?
Now let's go to tonight's training session. kitten had to take care of some personal things, so O/our training came a little later than normal, but W/we still got on skype, and before W/we began, i confessed that the silver chained clothes pegs started to rub me raw by the time i arrived to work, so i moved them to the top of my bra. He was not pleased, and for good reason! He asked me if i used my safe word or messaged Him to ask or use my safe word in a message to Him stating what i used it for and my answer was a big disappointing "no."
Although He was disappointed, He said He was going to let that slide, as He felt i would make the right decision next time AND He was certain there would be more that He would discover that would deserve punishment,
FOR EXAMPLE:
He then reminded me that i did not complete the task of sending Him my measurements, which meant that my collar would now be delayed due to my forgetfulness *sad face* This was important!!! kitten really blew it!!!
Punishment for this was the removal of kitten-play, pleasure and orgasm denial, but the real punishment was this:
The kitten-play with pleasure and orgasm is something that pleases Him immensely and due to my not following through with my assigned tasks and my needing to be punished, He was denied the pleasure He receives watching my kitten-play, pleasure and orgasm(s) - this made kitten VERY SAD - i tried to hold back the well of tears, but a couple fell from my eye sockets...
Sir is most generous and spends a lot of time, energy and money preparing things for His kitten and the lesson learned here is that i need to show Him that the tasks assigned are important to me and taken seriously or the consequences will be disappointment for both of U/us.
kitten for Sir
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Chosen!
Sir and i have been together for nearly 3 months. As i am a new submissive, W/we've talked about many subjects, researched many websites, read various different blogs (both subs and Doms) to gain different perspectives and opinions about a myriad of topics throughout my submissive journey.
One topic W/we talked about in the very beginning was wearing a collar and what it would represent to U/us if W/we chose to go there.
kitten says it that way, as i feel that every D/s relationship is different - a customizable creation that "is what it is to the two involved" and not what others think it should be or mean.
kitten says it that way, as i feel that every D/s relationship is different - a customizable creation that "is what it is to the two involved" and not what others think it should be or mean.
To U/us, a collar should only be considered if each role has earned it. The commitment and solemn vow that a collar represents on both sides should be taken seriously as any commitment or binding contract.
So, the subject came up again yesterday, and there were questions W/we asked each other:
- Do W/we have Honesty between us?
- Do W/we Respect each other with each role W/we have the calling for?
- Do W/we Trust each other in O/our respective roles?
- Does Sir feel that kitten has earned and understands the meaning of wearing Sirs collar?
- Does kitten feel that Sir has earned the giving of herself and belonging to Him?
Then Sir asked me to tie the ball gag around my neck to simulate a collar and asked me how it made me feel and i searched for a word...just one adjective to describe how it made me feel.
He asked me if it made me feel a sense of Security, a sense of belonging and i nodded, but those words were not enough to accurately convey how it made me feel, so He suggested kitten think about it for a few minutes and i did.
He asked me if it made me feel a sense of Security, a sense of belonging and i nodded, but those words were not enough to accurately convey how it made me feel, so He suggested kitten think about it for a few minutes and i did.
He stepped away for a few and when He returned, i told him it made me feel connected and attached to Him, like there was an invisible chain that filled the gap of thousands of miles that reality placed between U/us.
Then tonight, He had me put the temporary collar (ball gag) on my neck and kept it there during O/our training. Then towards the end of the training, it became very clear to me how the collar made me feel in one word:
 |
| kitten for Sir |
Sir has chosen me to be His submissive and i have chosen Him to be my Dom. W/we have pride in the fact that W/we are with each other by choice when there are so many others out there that W/we could be with.
The pull W/we have for each other as Dom and Sub extends to the Vanilla world too...as Man and woman, the love W/we've developed is beyond compare and that makes O/our D/s relationship that much more satisfying and rewarding on so many levels.
kitten will never forget when Sir sent me roses to celebrate O/our one month together...the card read, "What is a Thorn/Me without its rose/you?" and i melted into a puddle of butter!
The pull W/we have for each other as Dom and Sub extends to the Vanilla world too...as Man and woman, the love W/we've developed is beyond compare and that makes O/our D/s relationship that much more satisfying and rewarding on so many levels.
kitten will never forget when Sir sent me roses to celebrate O/our one month together...the card read, "What is a Thorn/Me without its rose/you?" and i melted into a puddle of butter!
I guess what i want to say is that this feels right for U/us and so W/we have chosen to add a collar to O/our world and are very happy to have come to this conclusion.
--kitten for Sir
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Disobedient kitten
For nearly 3 months now, kitten has recited and followed Sirs rules. These rules were well thought out, customized and specialized just for kitten and it is an honor to live by them, but sometimes...kitten forgets and acts according to her own accord and is considered disobedient, which that goes against one of His rules and will not be tolerated.
As part of my nightly training from a far, Sir will have me retrieve certain items from the drawer in my bedroom, so when He tells me to go get them, i walk away from the monitor, where He can see me on skype and go to my bedroom to grab the requested items. Sir can see me walk to my room, which is behind me when i skype and tonight...
When i returned to the computer, He asked me what i did prior to fulfilling His request, so i told Him what i did: kitten straightened up her bedding and picked up a few items that were on the floor...
Sir then told me to get into the submissive position and recite His rules, which i did. Then He asked me to come and it, so W/we could talk about this. He asked me about the last rule i recited and kitten repeated the rule: "i will not hesitate in my obedience to my Dom." He asked me if i followed this particular rule tonight and kitten could not say yes, as i felt like a disobedient kitten at that very moment.
Sir graciously informed me that He noticed my deviation from retrieving His requested items to straighten up my bed and pick a few things up off the floor instead of going, without hesitation, to complete the task kitten was assigned.
kitten realized that i had placed His desire aside to take care of my own desire and it went against one of His rules, so i had to be dealt with right then and there...
W/we started training, where He showed me how to create a rope gauntlet on my arm. It was simply beautiful and i felt so lovely wearing it. Then Sir asked me to "play" as He usually does, but this time, He did not have me clamp or peg or do anything that involved any pain of any kind and i felt like it was missing, and when i mentioned it, He then made sure i knew that it was purposely left out as a punishment for kitten's disobedience and i got it.
There is always a method to His madness...and a madness to His method *smiles*
It was the first time i had pleasure without pain since W/we met and it felt so different, but He still brought me to the brink and beyond. Even when being punished, He is so kind and giving - i learned my lesson, but He was so generous at the same time that i know i am a very lucky sub to have a Dom be so amazing, i truly know this and thanked Him for it.
Another topic came up tonight, but kitten will save it for a separate blog, as it is one of the most important topics of O/our D/s relationship and it is special, so i want to give it a spot light of its own...
Anal Preparation!
You are looking to find information on how to clean your anal (ass, butt, behind, booty) before engaging anal sex.
First off – anal sex is not a bad thing to practice and it is not just a gay thing! But there are couple of things you should know before getting down to it.
First off you and your partner should be both willing and be ready to have anal sex. If your partner is not ready or feel overwhelmed with the idea of having anal sex, don’t be pushy and give it time.
One of the first concerns are – is anal sex clean? Answer – YES and No! If you have feel that you have to go for #2 I’d recommend not to have anal sex. If you just went for #2, take a shower and you should be ready to go.
To be absolutely sure you should maybe please yourself with with an Enema. there various different ways:
Douche Enema Bag:
Our Premium 2 Quart Enema Kit is for those who want a hospital quality enema kit for home use. It has a large two quart capacity. This bag is designed to last a lifetime and will give many years of use. This bag is manufactured according to ISO standards and comes with all the equipment you will need for colonic therapy.
This is the type of bag used in many hospitals and professional clinics. You get all attachments needed and even a plug for the bag so you can use it as a hot water bottle.
Buy it from Amazon: Douce Enema Bag Kit
A little bit cheaper and more handy is this kit:
Here a costumer review:
I bought this douche bag for my husband and he just loves it. In the past, he has had a lot of issues with the attachments not fitting properly in his rectum and therefore causing him a lot of pain. I purchased this one because the company was so kind to show all of the parts to the mechanism on the front of the box and it looked as though this would be a far more comfortable option for my husband. He has had problems with his anus for years but this douche bag really did the trick. He was able to insert it into his rectum with ease, a nice change for him, I imagine. Also, he likes the fact that he can suction cup the douche bag itself onto our bathroom wall so that he can douche in a jiffy and not have to waste any time trying to hunt down all the pieces.
Buy this douche bag from Amazon: Unisex Douche Bag
And even easier and more hassle free (even fits on your handbag):
Lie on left side with knee bent and arms resting comfortably. Knee-chest position: Kneel, then lower head and chest forward until left side of face is resting on surface with left arm folded comfortably. REMOVE ORANGE PROTECTIVE SHIELD FROM ENEMA COMFORTIP BEFORE INSERTING. With steady pressure, gently insert enema tip into rectum with a slight side-to-side movement, with tip pointing toward navel. Insertion may be easier if person receiving enema bears down, as if having a bowel movement. This helps relax the muscles around the anus. Do not force the enema tip into rectum as this can cause injury.
Squeeze bottle until nearly all liquid is gone. It is not necessary to empty the bottle completely as it contains more liquid than needed. Remove Comfort tip from rectum and maintain position until urge to evacuate is strong (usually 2 to 5 minutes).CAUTION:Using more than one enema in 24 hours can be harmful.
Buy from Amazon: Handbag Fleet Enema
So now your are clean and ready to go – an other very valid question rises. Is anal sex painful – answer is yes if you are not used to it. Are there ways to prevent pain? Answer is YES.
Sliding up a finger up the butt is one way to ease the way. An other way is using a butt plug:
This one is extremely suitable for first time anal sexers. It slides in super easy and you can adjust it by pumping for your liking.
Amazon: Butt Plug Pump
An other great way to reduce pain are pain reducing gels which serves as a lubricant at the same time.
Here for the pro – Astroglide:
Buy it from Amazon: Astroglide
Anal Eaze is a little cheaper:
Available here: Anal Eaze
You should be all set to take a ride on the wild side. Please have anal sex in moderation since you could hurt your rectum permanently!!! Also, be aware anal sex can transmit STDs to both partners. So use condoms and make sure to only use lubricant based on silicon and not fat, since it might cause damage to the condom.
Hope this helps – feel free to ask question in the comment sections and some of the existing comments are pretty helpful as well.
This information is from the following website:
www.random-good-stuff.com
This is from a website...kitten would appreciate some real life information & suggestions from the D/s world - PLEASE COMMENT :)
--kitten
First off – anal sex is not a bad thing to practice and it is not just a gay thing! But there are couple of things you should know before getting down to it.
First off you and your partner should be both willing and be ready to have anal sex. If your partner is not ready or feel overwhelmed with the idea of having anal sex, don’t be pushy and give it time.
One of the first concerns are – is anal sex clean? Answer – YES and No! If you have feel that you have to go for #2 I’d recommend not to have anal sex. If you just went for #2, take a shower and you should be ready to go.
To be absolutely sure you should maybe please yourself with with an Enema. there various different ways:
Douche Enema Bag:
Our Premium 2 Quart Enema Kit is for those who want a hospital quality enema kit for home use. It has a large two quart capacity. This bag is designed to last a lifetime and will give many years of use. This bag is manufactured according to ISO standards and comes with all the equipment you will need for colonic therapy.
This is the type of bag used in many hospitals and professional clinics. You get all attachments needed and even a plug for the bag so you can use it as a hot water bottle.
Buy it from Amazon: Douce Enema Bag Kit
A little bit cheaper and more handy is this kit:
Here a costumer review:
I bought this douche bag for my husband and he just loves it. In the past, he has had a lot of issues with the attachments not fitting properly in his rectum and therefore causing him a lot of pain. I purchased this one because the company was so kind to show all of the parts to the mechanism on the front of the box and it looked as though this would be a far more comfortable option for my husband. He has had problems with his anus for years but this douche bag really did the trick. He was able to insert it into his rectum with ease, a nice change for him, I imagine. Also, he likes the fact that he can suction cup the douche bag itself onto our bathroom wall so that he can douche in a jiffy and not have to waste any time trying to hunt down all the pieces.
Buy this douche bag from Amazon: Unisex Douche Bag
And even easier and more hassle free (even fits on your handbag):
Lie on left side with knee bent and arms resting comfortably. Knee-chest position: Kneel, then lower head and chest forward until left side of face is resting on surface with left arm folded comfortably. REMOVE ORANGE PROTECTIVE SHIELD FROM ENEMA COMFORTIP BEFORE INSERTING. With steady pressure, gently insert enema tip into rectum with a slight side-to-side movement, with tip pointing toward navel. Insertion may be easier if person receiving enema bears down, as if having a bowel movement. This helps relax the muscles around the anus. Do not force the enema tip into rectum as this can cause injury.
Squeeze bottle until nearly all liquid is gone. It is not necessary to empty the bottle completely as it contains more liquid than needed. Remove Comfort tip from rectum and maintain position until urge to evacuate is strong (usually 2 to 5 minutes).CAUTION:Using more than one enema in 24 hours can be harmful.
Buy from Amazon: Handbag Fleet Enema
So now your are clean and ready to go – an other very valid question rises. Is anal sex painful – answer is yes if you are not used to it. Are there ways to prevent pain? Answer is YES.
Sliding up a finger up the butt is one way to ease the way. An other way is using a butt plug:
This one is extremely suitable for first time anal sexers. It slides in super easy and you can adjust it by pumping for your liking.
Amazon: Butt Plug Pump
An other great way to reduce pain are pain reducing gels which serves as a lubricant at the same time.
Here for the pro – Astroglide:
Buy it from Amazon: Astroglide
Anal Eaze is a little cheaper:
Available here: Anal Eaze
You should be all set to take a ride on the wild side. Please have anal sex in moderation since you could hurt your rectum permanently!!! Also, be aware anal sex can transmit STDs to both partners. So use condoms and make sure to only use lubricant based on silicon and not fat, since it might cause damage to the condom.
Hope this helps – feel free to ask question in the comment sections and some of the existing comments are pretty helpful as well.
This information is from the following website:
www.random-good-stuff.com
This is from a website...kitten would appreciate some real life information & suggestions from the D/s world - PLEASE COMMENT :)
--kitten
Saturday, April 16, 2011
The day O/our eyes met
If kitten hasn't mentioned it, Sir and i live thousands of miles apart and communicate daily via text and nightly via skype. A few weeks ago, however, after 2 months of not being able to actualize the physical D/s adventure, the day came where O/our eyes met and the long awaited kiss finally happened...
For a few weeks prior, Sir was told that there was a possibility he could take a training course and it happened to be right where i lived!!! As the days past, W/we grew more and more excited to finally gaze upon each other in real life, kiss the lips that have only spoken, touch the skin that W/we've longed to caress and do everything Sir has trained me on long distance...
Was i nervous? No! Anxuious? Hell Yes!!! (LOL)
In His line of work, things change all the time and travel can hit at any moment (without going into detail about what He does, it is military-related).
Anywhooooo: Friday came and He still was not sure about coming that weekend, which was torture in itself!
Saturday came and i received a text message that said, "How bad do you want O/our first kiss, kitten?" Upon reading this, i started to cry deeply as i knew my Sir was coming to be with me, finally!
The next day, Sunday, at 13:53 (lol, love it when the military use time like that!), His plane was to arrive and i was at the airport, pacing back and forth at the escalators, asking a passenger from each plane that landed if they were coming from where Sir was from...
20 minutes go by and i grew very VERY anxious, palms started to sweat and the thought of Him not making the flight entered my head...then i saw Him...
He came right to me and W/we hugged tight for a moment, then He cupped my face in His hands and said, "kitten: skype does not do you justice, you are so breathtakingly beautiful" and then kissed me as though no one else existed in the airport. It was like a scene from "Officer and a Gentleman" - the most unbelievable first impression!
Honestly, skype did not do Him justice either, He was the most handsome, gorgeous, beautiful man i have ever laid eyes on, including any movie star, etc. and kitten melted into butter right there in the airport!
W/we spent a whole week together and it was soooo fucking (sorry for swearing) incredible!!!!!
I will talk more about O/our week in other posts, but for now i can say that both Sir and i feel extremely blessed that the stars have all aligned to make O/our union a reality and W/we could not be happier!
Thursday, April 14, 2011
His, mine, O/ours
So.....
Sir and i have a mix of Vanilla and Non-Vanilla in O/our relationship. He always treats me with respect and visa versa, but there are some instances where He will think of things that give Him concern or have Him worried and does not want me to be concerned or worried with Him, but if there is something that concerns me, it becomes His concern...
Without going into detail, Sir has been dealing with an issue from His past that'll rear its ugly head from time to time - its not that He can't handle it, but it takes Him to a place of frustation, which makes me want to comfort Him and help Him work through it. He has talked about it in order for me to understand, but does not want me to worry or be concerned about it. I can appreciate the fact that He does not wish to worry me, but it is difficult to be happy when He suffers here and there. When W/we talked about this, he stated that His problems are His and my problems are His, but His problems are not mine...this is hard to wrap my head around, but i am trying to get it.
Aside from being a sub, i am also a woman and have a heart when it comes to the sufferings of others in my environment, so all i can do is pray for the situation to change and for His happiness, as i do not want to do anything to take away from his Dominance over me.
Perhaps it is a control that needs to be given to Him, but my heart tells me to support Him through good and bad times, but i want to be a good sub, so i am left a bit bewildered on if there's a middle ground or not.
It's not that i want to have any say in His situation or have a desire to solve His issue - that is not my place, nor is it His job to solve my problems, but to be there to listen and soothe is in my nature...is it not good for a sub to be feeling this way? How can one be happy when their other half is not? He knows how i feel and i do not want Him to put on a smile when He is in the middle of being miserable...i can sense when things are not right with Him...he doesn't really have to say anything, but then again, perhaps He is looking to me to be the happy kitten i am to lift Him out of 'it' with just being me. *shrugs*
Thoughts?
--kitten for Sir
Sir and i have a mix of Vanilla and Non-Vanilla in O/our relationship. He always treats me with respect and visa versa, but there are some instances where He will think of things that give Him concern or have Him worried and does not want me to be concerned or worried with Him, but if there is something that concerns me, it becomes His concern...
Without going into detail, Sir has been dealing with an issue from His past that'll rear its ugly head from time to time - its not that He can't handle it, but it takes Him to a place of frustation, which makes me want to comfort Him and help Him work through it. He has talked about it in order for me to understand, but does not want me to worry or be concerned about it. I can appreciate the fact that He does not wish to worry me, but it is difficult to be happy when He suffers here and there. When W/we talked about this, he stated that His problems are His and my problems are His, but His problems are not mine...this is hard to wrap my head around, but i am trying to get it.
Aside from being a sub, i am also a woman and have a heart when it comes to the sufferings of others in my environment, so all i can do is pray for the situation to change and for His happiness, as i do not want to do anything to take away from his Dominance over me.
Perhaps it is a control that needs to be given to Him, but my heart tells me to support Him through good and bad times, but i want to be a good sub, so i am left a bit bewildered on if there's a middle ground or not.
It's not that i want to have any say in His situation or have a desire to solve His issue - that is not my place, nor is it His job to solve my problems, but to be there to listen and soothe is in my nature...is it not good for a sub to be feeling this way? How can one be happy when their other half is not? He knows how i feel and i do not want Him to put on a smile when He is in the middle of being miserable...i can sense when things are not right with Him...he doesn't really have to say anything, but then again, perhaps He is looking to me to be the happy kitten i am to lift Him out of 'it' with just being me. *shrugs*
Thoughts?
--kitten for Sir
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Piercings!
Hi all,
One of the first things kitten did after announcing to her former husband she wanted a divorce, was to pierce her ears with 4 at once, starting at the top, which still hurts a lot, but it was something i thought about for years and finally did and could not be happier!
There's a period where one is not allowed to remove the initial silver hoops and that date has passed, so i replaced them with some colorful new earrings:
Toodles!
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
kitten has wings!!!
Today kitten started using the beautiful Butterfly Clamps Sir gave me during O/our week we spent together, which is a huge difference than the wooden clothes pegs i have been training with for the past 2 1/2 months...the tiny metal balls pinch my nipples with some serious pressure that sends my pain threshold through the roof for about 30 to 40 seconds...then it calms down and they are actually comfortable...until i am told to remove them, then OUCH (but a good ouch of course)!!! The pain shoots up to an 8, which is pretty high, but not high enough to use my safe word *wink*
Sir has me peg - well now i am clamping - each morning for 10 minutes in front of the mirror. He usually gives me things to think about, but mostly He wants me to see myself as He sees me and appreciate all my feminine curves, etc.
He tells me i am flawless, which is not how kitten used to see herself in the past, but certainly how she sees herself now and it feels awesome!
Also, kitten will periodically receive a text message at any time during the course of my day to peg/clamp for a specific amount of time with specific thoughts in mind and sometimes i take pics and send them, while other times, He lets me know pic(s) are not required.
This week, i was told to bring His flogger with me every day and He has incorporated it into my pegging/clamping and it gets kitten really excited!
OMG: Sir wrote me an email containing His thoughts about the week W/we spent together and it left me feeling breathless...no really - kitten had to catch her breath! The first day, He presented me with a beautiful, dainty necklace with a pretty little Butterfly on it - this represents the spreading of my submissive wings, along with my freedom of being divorced after being married for over 15 years (my ex-husband and i are friends, which is the way it should be, as there was no passion left in our marriage - it took a lot for me to make the decision to move on with my life, but i did and feel like i went from a caterpillar to a cocoon to a full-winged Butterfly!
Obviously, He did this on His own accord and i won't go into detail about His exact thoughts, but let me say that it is rare to find a person who completes you...well...completely *giggles*
kitten would like to close this note with this: i get great satisfaction in pleasing Sir in every way possible and in return, He fulfills my every desire - how could anyone not be happy with such a great exchange of pain and pleasure???
Sir has me peg - well now i am clamping - each morning for 10 minutes in front of the mirror. He usually gives me things to think about, but mostly He wants me to see myself as He sees me and appreciate all my feminine curves, etc.
He tells me i am flawless, which is not how kitten used to see herself in the past, but certainly how she sees herself now and it feels awesome!
Also, kitten will periodically receive a text message at any time during the course of my day to peg/clamp for a specific amount of time with specific thoughts in mind and sometimes i take pics and send them, while other times, He lets me know pic(s) are not required.
This week, i was told to bring His flogger with me every day and He has incorporated it into my pegging/clamping and it gets kitten really excited!
Today was a fantastic day all the way around!
OMG: Sir wrote me an email containing His thoughts about the week W/we spent together and it left me feeling breathless...no really - kitten had to catch her breath! The first day, He presented me with a beautiful, dainty necklace with a pretty little Butterfly on it - this represents the spreading of my submissive wings, along with my freedom of being divorced after being married for over 15 years (my ex-husband and i are friends, which is the way it should be, as there was no passion left in our marriage - it took a lot for me to make the decision to move on with my life, but i did and feel like i went from a caterpillar to a cocoon to a full-winged Butterfly!
Obviously, He did this on His own accord and i won't go into detail about His exact thoughts, but let me say that it is rare to find a person who completes you...well...completely *giggles*
kitten would like to close this note with this: i get great satisfaction in pleasing Sir in every way possible and in return, He fulfills my every desire - how could anyone not be happy with such a great exchange of pain and pleasure???
Monday, April 11, 2011
Funny D/s Language
OK, so as a new sub, i am still getting used to the correct D/s language...and sometimes, i get tickled at the way W/we talk about His possessions because i am a Virgo and take most things literally...
So, when i say something like His cock filled His ass so beautifully, it strikes me as slightly humorous *smiles* and i mean no disrespect at all, just that it is not possible for Him to take His ass - yes i know it's His kitten's ass, but i don't say that, i say He took His ass and it gets a little confusing when i am a literal person.
i am sure it is not funny at all and i am being a brat for even blogging about it, but i wanted to express myself on this subject once and then leave it alone, so please forgive my comedic take on it.
*Muah*
--kitten
So, when i say something like His cock filled His ass so beautifully, it strikes me as slightly humorous *smiles* and i mean no disrespect at all, just that it is not possible for Him to take His ass - yes i know it's His kitten's ass, but i don't say that, i say He took His ass and it gets a little confusing when i am a literal person.
i am sure it is not funny at all and i am being a brat for even blogging about it, but i wanted to express myself on this subject once and then leave it alone, so please forgive my comedic take on it.
*Muah*
--kitten
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Two in body, One in mind
Today was such a relaxing day, but as the sun sets over the desert, I am reminded that Sir and i are so far apart...
However, each day that passes only deepens my yearning for His touch, longing for His domination, craving for His loving arms to hold me and for Him to take me in every way He desires (and all of it brings me the most pleasure i have never known).
Until W/we are together again, i will be the best kitten i can be, following His wishes, completing His tasks, sending Him positive and beautiful thoughts of His happiness, and until that day comes, W/we will remain Two in body, One in mind...
Though W/we have thousands of miles between U/us, i look at the same sky as He does and revel in the fact that W/we will one day be together again and it lessens my loneliness for Him.
Please don't get me wrong, being able to see each other via skype is a total benefit, but now that W/we've connected beyond mentally into the physical realm of D/s, i will never be the same...
As i write this, tears are streaming down kitten's face...but they are not tears of sadness - they are tears of joy and elation that He and i are connected on numerous levels, which so many others do not have in their lives and it is completely amazing!
However, each day that passes only deepens my yearning for His touch, longing for His domination, craving for His loving arms to hold me and for Him to take me in every way He desires (and all of it brings me the most pleasure i have never known).
Until W/we are together again, i will be the best kitten i can be, following His wishes, completing His tasks, sending Him positive and beautiful thoughts of His happiness, and until that day comes, W/we will remain Two in body, One in mind...
Though W/we have thousands of miles between U/us, i look at the same sky as He does and revel in the fact that W/we will one day be together again and it lessens my loneliness for Him.
Please don't get me wrong, being able to see each other via skype is a total benefit, but now that W/we've connected beyond mentally into the physical realm of D/s, i will never be the same...
As i write this, tears are streaming down kitten's face...but they are not tears of sadness - they are tears of joy and elation that He and i are connected on numerous levels, which so many others do not have in their lives and it is completely amazing!
Saturday, April 9, 2011
Disappointed my Sir
Yesterday, kitten disappointed her Sir...
i said something to Him without thinking about some information i learned the previous day and it made Him very disappointed with me, which cuts me like a knife. Aside from that, i was not fully unclothed when W/we skyped and i do know better...
Although i was sad that i disappointed Sir, He is very gracious with His punishment, which usually ends up being very pleasurable.
Also, when Sir asked me to recite kitten's rules, i blanked out on the last one, which really gets my goat, but He focused on the positive, which was i got 9 out of ten. This only makes me determined to get all ten tonight!
So...it's been a week since He was here with me, and i ache every day without being able to receive my training in person...and feel His eyes gaze upon me...and mostly, not being able to receive kitten's feeding hurts the worst! OK, maybe not having His lips on mine is the worst, but the feeding is something i yearn for!
Ahhh, the week W/we spent together was so amazing - and it could have gone either way when a relationship is formed online, but the power of SKYPE is phenomenal! W/we see each other every night, unless circumstances prevent it (time or travel), but to receive my training in person was...OMG: Far Out! Sure i can pull my own hair *cough* but somehow, when He did it, i was hooked :) He dazzled His kitten's body with Japanese rope, used a paddle and flogger and took what is His: EVERYTHING!
...and i knew i was His completely!
At the end of O/our visit, He mouthed the words kitten longed to know: "I love you" and my heart dropped to my feet. From the bottom of my heart (or feet-lol), i feel so fortunate to have Him as my Dom and i will treasure my submissive journey with Him every step of the way!
--kitten for Sir
i said something to Him without thinking about some information i learned the previous day and it made Him very disappointed with me, which cuts me like a knife. Aside from that, i was not fully unclothed when W/we skyped and i do know better...
Although i was sad that i disappointed Sir, He is very gracious with His punishment, which usually ends up being very pleasurable.
Also, when Sir asked me to recite kitten's rules, i blanked out on the last one, which really gets my goat, but He focused on the positive, which was i got 9 out of ten. This only makes me determined to get all ten tonight!
So...it's been a week since He was here with me, and i ache every day without being able to receive my training in person...and feel His eyes gaze upon me...and mostly, not being able to receive kitten's feeding hurts the worst! OK, maybe not having His lips on mine is the worst, but the feeding is something i yearn for!
Ahhh, the week W/we spent together was so amazing - and it could have gone either way when a relationship is formed online, but the power of SKYPE is phenomenal! W/we see each other every night, unless circumstances prevent it (time or travel), but to receive my training in person was...OMG: Far Out! Sure i can pull my own hair *cough* but somehow, when He did it, i was hooked :) He dazzled His kitten's body with Japanese rope, used a paddle and flogger and took what is His: EVERYTHING!
...and i knew i was His completely!
At the end of O/our visit, He mouthed the words kitten longed to know: "I love you" and my heart dropped to my feet. From the bottom of my heart (or feet-lol), i feel so fortunate to have Him as my Dom and i will treasure my submissive journey with Him every step of the way!
--kitten for Sir
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Introducing: kitten for Sir
Hi all,
i am a new submissive to my one and only Dom, whom i refer to as Sir. W/we met unexpectedly via an online MORPG game and via a friend in common on Facebook. W/we started talking and BAM: learned that He was Dominant and i...well...i was interested in learning more about getting in touch with my submissive side.
After a couple of months of skyping, we finally met in person and all i can say is WOW. It was the most amazing week of my life. W/we got to actualize all the things W/we did over skype and i really REALLY loved it!
i am going to write more about me, O/our relationship and ask for some opinions about things in order to understand other D/s relationships, which will in turn allow me the knowledge and growth W/we seek to assist in my submissive journey...
--kitten for Sir
i am a new submissive to my one and only Dom, whom i refer to as Sir. W/we met unexpectedly via an online MORPG game and via a friend in common on Facebook. W/we started talking and BAM: learned that He was Dominant and i...well...i was interested in learning more about getting in touch with my submissive side.
After a couple of months of skyping, we finally met in person and all i can say is WOW. It was the most amazing week of my life. W/we got to actualize all the things W/we did over skype and i really REALLY loved it!
i am going to write more about me, O/our relationship and ask for some opinions about things in order to understand other D/s relationships, which will in turn allow me the knowledge and growth W/we seek to assist in my submissive journey...
--kitten for Sir
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