Monday, December 19, 2011

Tone it down?!

This is sort of a rant, so forgive me in advance...

My Mother loves telling everyone that my brother gave her 36 hours of labor and cried so often, that he was considered the family's 'cry-baby' and that her labor with me started and i was born about 30 minutes later, barely making it to the hospital and that after my first cry, it was all giggles from there, well mostly...

i have always felt a mission to brighten people's lives, make people smile and laugh when ever i have the chance.  i have always felt there is so much darkness in the world that it was my lot in life to be the sunniest and warmest person on the planet.  Also, i am very well aware of the Yin-Yang of things and that there are just as many negative people as there are positive people and i don't try to change people, but i do try to help the people that are negative, sad, depressed, etc. by finding the silver lining and encouraging as many people as possible on a daily basis.

That being said, from time to time, i run into people that just cannot stand my beacon of makes there darkness (that they apparently enjoy and want company in their misery too) seem even darker.  i have been told to 'tone it down' so many times and i find that really strange.  I am told to keep my excitement for life and the things that are going on that i am happy about to myself.  i enjoy sharing my joy with people, but have to respect those that are bothered by me...i suppose.

i am not here to be a thorn in any one's side, but it is very difficult to keep my light from's just who i am...i don't try to change anyone, so why do some people want me to change?  It's just not fair and it does not feel good to keep my happiness bottled up.  i mean, i know when it is appropriate to tone it down...when my Boss is in a bad mood, someone had a death in the family, you know...i know when to tone it down, but when things are normal every day, i just want to be myself. *sigh*

i am at the point at work where i keep all my happiness to myself and share nothing.  People ask me about SirW or my vacation, i just give them a short non-happy answer.  If i show any excitement, it gets turned on Boss's wife will say she realizes how happy and excited i am about my boyfriend, but it's affecting my work, which is bullshit - i am a professional and multitask and do so much for my company, most of which i do not talk about as it would be bragging, i just get my job done.

OK, i think i got it all out...sorry guys, i just needed to vent a little...




  1. Whenever my girlfriend and I go out we are the giggling duo of happiness. The looks and sometimes comments we get are hysterical. There are so many unhappy people out there it's ridiculous.
    Stay true to yourself.

  2. I love to be around positive, happy people, kitten! There's nothing wrong with being the way you are:).


  3. Why should you change who you are? The grumps will always be the grumps. And I notice how they seek out the joyous people to cling to and squash as misery loves company.