i knew there would be an adjustment period with my moving to Canada. i knew i was the Step mother that would take some of their Father's attention away from them to make room for me. i did not think it would be easy for anyone involved. And, for the most part, relations with the kids have been developing steadily.
But some days have me feeling like an intruder. An outsider. The new girl in school that wants to fit in.
I mean, just because their Father loves me and wants to spend the rest of His life with me, does not mean the children have to love me and have a relationship with me. It would be ideal, but it is something that i cannot force. His son has accepted me much more than His daughter at this point. Neither of them are mean to me, but i do sometimes feel like i am in the way of the life they were living.
My hope is that i can affect their lives in a positive way by setting a good example in front of them. i am human and have emotions though, so there are times when i am sensitive and/or get frustrated with situations just like the next person. The kids have these feelings too. Dealing with all of it is not easy, but i hope that time will allow the kids to see that i care about their well-being and happiness.
Being their Step mom does not mean i will ever feel like a mom or that they will see me as a parent, but i hope in time, they will see me as family and truly love me for me.
Today i do not feel it, today i am a little sad...